A Weekend Unplanned

Happy Memorial Day Weekend!  We had blessed nothingness on our calendar (except for a chiropractor appointment and church commitments).  That meant lots of room for angst in my mind over days with nothing planned.  Matt and I slogged our way through Friday with low grade fevers, **impossible to swallow, insanely painful sore throat** yuckiness, busy work days and collapsed on the couch after getting the boys to bed.  I was so grateful that nothing was planned.  For once, this type a, need to have everything scheduled girl appreciated the lack of planning and open-endedness of three days off with all of our family home!

We did the basics….laundry, farmer’s market veggie shopping, LEGO building, room sorting/purging {the one MUST do was to locate a lost library book of Alex’s–happy to report, Fred and Ted Go Camping was FOUND!!!!}, painting, cooking, back care, swinging on the swingset, lots of alfresco dining, CAMPING!!! & classic movie watching, Sunday School teaching….and amazingly feel rested, healthier and didn’t have to deal with lots of traffic.  Can’t beat that!

Time and space and maybe…{SCARY!}….GROWING UP!?!?…..has helped me let go of my grasp on the perfectly planned, chalk-full schedule.  To see the value of time spent together, letting go of the need to program and craft a perfect get away.  This week I plan on posting some thoughts from Lauren Winner’s new book Still.  There is so much to unpack from this book–my poor husband had to suffer from me continuously reading quotes to him over the last two days as I devoured it.  It truly is THAT good.  Despite working in the classroom, battling a nasty bug that has left me only wanting to sleep, and with two boys needing our attention, I couldn’t put it down.  It even won out over mindless TV!  Miracles of miracles.  This quote from Saul Bellow that she shared hit me as I was thinking about our schedule, or lack thereof, this weekend.

Look how cute he is….gotta love Nobel Prize Winners!

Isn’t he WISE, though?!?!  ”They labor because rest terrifies them.”  Did you catch that?  ”They labor because rest terrifies them.”  I’m trying to sit with that truth.  That rest terrifies.  That sloth isn’t about lying around doing NOTHING, necessarily, but rather it truly is a “busy condition”.

I don’t have the answers.  I will always struggle with a deep need for control.  But, I’m choosing to keep it “simple” this weekend.  A first step at “resting”–stepping into the “terror” of rest, if you will.  To allow for time in the sun, sprinklers being directed at me by our 19 month old, no-cook meals {this girl attempting vegan, gluten free eating had baguette, brie and dry salami–and pears!!–for dinner}.  More to follow about Lauren Winner and her new book.  For today, though, lots to chew on thanks to Saul Bellow.  Tough truth, but a good one.

Hope you had a great Memorial Day weekend…

off to find flags to photograph for my step-mother-in-law!

Memory Is An Extraordinary Thing

Almost a year and a half ago I started writing in this space, trying to find an outlet for processing the world I was inhabiting.  I shared here about why I chose the name These Stones for this place.  And as this week perfectly exemplifies, sometimes I use this blog as a space to share recipes.  Other times, daily antics of my children are the focus.  Some days I process my faith journey, my questions and thoughts about following God.

For me, though, I so easily forget.  And I want so desperately NOT to.  To remember.  As the quote shares so eloquently, much more clearly than I ever could, “God instructed His people on their journey to erect physical markers ‘along the way as aids to their memory.  The idea was that they were to remember His gracious provision and protection for them in the past, so that they might be encouraged to trust Him in the present.”  

So today, I’m sharing two incidents that happened yesterday.  I managed to see them and capture them on my camera.  I was actually looking for a way to “erect a physical marker”…an opportunity to keep these two moments as something more than a fleeting happening.

My children push my buttons REGULARLY, as I’m sure my neighbors can attest to.  I can’t even imagine what they think of our household as they hear my RAISED, TEACHER VOICE or Drew’s sobbing or Alex’s temper tantrums raging.  That aside, today, two little miracles happened.

First, Drew’s.  Matt’s Dad does some printwork.  (aka MODELING).  I like to give him a hard time about it.  Here’s one of the latest ads he was in.  Go, Lipitor!

When I was taking some photographs for him, “head shots”!, he brought his last page of pictures so I’d have an idea of what he needed.  Alex, my eldest, quickly snatched it up after our photoshoot for his own special papers collection.  Well today, Drew came across it.  Drew is only 18 months and can’t talk, per se, but it was CLEAR he knew who those photos were showcasing—-MACHO POP!  Check out this sequence and sorry, in advance, for the blur.

Did you catch that?  Those adoring looks of love for Grandpa?  The kissing of the photographs?  I mean, geez, Louise!, you seriously can’t script that.  And I will shout it from the rooftops again and again, WE ARE SO LUCKY TO HAVE FIVE PHENOMENAL GRANDPARENTS IN OUR KIDS’ LIVES.  SO  SO SO SO LUCKY.  I am so glad Drew “gets it” too.

And the next moment today, number two on “Memory List”?  This one’s Alex’s.  My dear friend, Julie, did something Pinterest worthy and amazing a month ago.  Alex’s preschool class was having a St. Patrick’s Day party and she made a rainbow fruit plate/concoction of amazingness.  I didn’t see it as I was teaching that day and not at drop off or pick up, but Alex has been going on and on about it for the last 4 weeks.  He took matters into his own hands and declared that we needed to recreate Julie’s rainbow platter for dinner.

Trying to curtail and contain Alex’s never-ending STORM of ideas is a full time job for me.  Last night, some dam broke and I just gave in and let him go for it.  It seemed the lesser of two evils.  I mean, how destructive can an almost five year old be with FRUIT and VEGETABLES!?!?  He was also quite convincing in that it was a perfect vegan-friendly meal for Matt and me too.  How thoughtful….especially with those dirt and sand covered hands we forgot to wash until we were 80% of the way into the project.  Yum.

Here’s what he came up with.  And you’ll see Drew’s delight over it all.  The blue food coloring in the cream cheese on the bagels….???? Weak, I know.  And a HUGE mess.  Oh, well.  You win some.  You lose some.

Of course the rainbow-filled sky would not be complete without helicopters, airplanes and birds….thus, markers were fetched and additions were made.

These two moments weren’t life-changing by any means.  But they both were, for me, reminders of the gift these two boys are.  Markers I can look back to, to remember when I’m pulling my hair out.  Lines drawn in the sand to say, “Don’t forget when….”  I could chalk it up to fruit, vegetables and a piece of paper with some photographs, but today, I’m clinging to these things, seeing them as the reminders they are of God’s extreme goodness in my life.  The ways in which God seeks to love me and show me himself in the world that surrounds me.

“What do these stones mean?

He did this so that all the people

of the earth might know that the

hand of the Lord is powerful and

so that you might always fear the Lord your God.”

Joshua 4:22b,24

Postscript:  Today, Micha Boyett Hohorst at mama::monk writes about Dishes and Litany and all that Beauty.  Go there and read her post.  SO eloquent and hits on the same notes I was talking about today.  And secondly, thank you so much for your generosity, love, support and encouragement after my words here yesterday.  So much love.  Thank you. 

Hanalei Bay in a Bowl

Deep down, I am craving a little Hawaii time in a bad way.  Sand.  Fruity drinks.  Waves crashing.  Tropical breezes.  Ah, yes.  Glory Hallelujah.

So this morning, I set out to create a little Hawaii for breakfast.  As in “Hanalei Bay Oatmeal”.  Yes, I’m crazy.  It didn’t quite take me to the beaches of Kauai, but it was still yummy, especially with some extra strong coffee.

Here’s the recipe if you want to try your own tropical oatmeal.

Hanalei Bay Oatmeal

• 2 cups of water
• 1 cup of gluten free oatmeal
• 1/2  cup of coconut milk (we used the light coconut milk from Trader Joes)
• 1 cup frozen mango (diced)
• 1 cup frozen pineapple (diced)
• 2 bananas, sliced
• dash of cinnamon
• 1/2 t vanilla (I highly recommend Madagascar Bourbon Vanilla)
• 2 T flax seeds
• (optional:  shredded, unsweeted coconut and walnuts)

Directions:

Put water in a pot on the stove.  Bring water to a boil.  Add remaining ingredients and let simmer on medium for 8 minutes (ish).  Serve with shredded coconut and walnut pieces.  It’s extra yummy to drizzle a little of the leftover canned coconut milk or Coconut Milk creamer on top.

and yes, this was happening in the adjoining room while the oatmeal preparation was happening….

where are those tropical beaches?!?

DPP ’11 // Mary {of Sunnyvale vs. Biblical Times}

We had the gift of being invited over to a modern day Mary’s house today…to make her family “traditional” Santa cookies.  These beauties are complete with chocolate chips for eyes, a cherry piece for a nose, coconut for the beard and a marshmallow on the top for the hat.  Fun times!  She took on the hurricane of three boys {well, my TWO were really the major hurricane force} today and it was such a blessing for the boys and the moms to be treated to such a special day.  Mary, like so many others, has been a warm welcoming presence to us from the start and I feel so lucky that my boys get to enjoy her creativity, love….and COOKING SKILLS!

{Luckily, Mary has 4 kids—all boys—-

so I always feel like she knows the ins and outs of parenting boys!}

Instilling Habits

I love lists. I am sure I’ve mentioned it here before. Even created a “list club” in 5th grade. The club revolved around bringing fun notebooks and pens to school and making fancy lists. Any surprise I was senior class secretary??

Matt and I tend to have a regular “discussion” centered around our meal plans. For me, the subscriber to MANY food magazines and blogs, making binders of clipped recipes to try is a habit, and oddly enough, a joy. I love the unknowns of a new recipe, whether or not we’ll like the result and whether the chopping, peeling and preparing will be worth it. It has happened more than once that I neglected to read the recipe before diving in, only to find out the meat was to marinate overnight or the bread needed to rise 2 hours before baking (that MAY have been last night….just maybe…..good thing I was making FLATbread!).

Matt’s philosophy is to have a small rotation of meals that are simple and tasty, alleviating the guess work and stress. Rather than deciding what to eat and then stressing in the kitchen making something new each night, things are streamlined and easier to budget for.

Every time he brings this approach up, I cringe and feel like I am being forced into a straightjacket.

So like good opposites, opposites that are married, we have kind of reached a compromise. I have decided on a few “categories” which will be making an appearance each week—–pasta, stir fry, pizza, tacos, salad and soup. But….the creativity can shape something unique nonetheless. Tonight I attempted pizza with potato, rosemary, pancetta and fontina. Last night our stir fry was a little more Mediterranean—roasted summer veggies on hummus with a poached egg and homemade, grilled flatbread. (Thank you Chad and Kim Rodgers for that inspiration a few years back!). Fish tostadas with tomatoes from our garden and avocados…

(tostada fixings from a recent dinner)

Despite being a list making fiend, I hadn’t considered using it for grocery shopping, planning and as a budget helper. My friend, Casey, has done this for years, and after weeks on end of tossing expired, limp and lifeless produce, I knew I needed an intervention a few years back. So, we began planning meals for the week, creating our shopping lists by category (I’ve gotten many compliments from the Trader Joes staff for my Sharpie written, colorful and organized masterpieces….haha, little do they know it is truly to make the process of shopping as quick and painless as possible with the two boys!)

I have been wanting to take the next step of posting the week’s plan, rather than trying to dig for the little scrap of paper that tells me what meals I have ingredients for. Basically, an excuse to buy a clipboard and use colorful pens?!

Planning allows us to look at the week ahead and plan appropriately for meals….easy meals for days that are full and will be a bit tricky, cooler meals for hot days (did NOT do a good job of that this week!!!!!), and special weekly meals like breakfast for dinner. This week was especially toasty, so we scrapped the plan one night so we could use the tomatoes overflowing off our vines and washed it down with LOTS of water.

Alex has been in charge of the grocery list while shopping for awhile and now that he’s working on writing letters, he insisted on making his own menu for the week.

His plan pretty much included a fruit a day…he insisted on planning healthy foods. Would be great if he actually followed through on that!!!! I shouldn’t complain—his desire to buy kale at the farmer’s market or eating all our tomatoes off the vine is something to be grateful for.

Now that we are one week in, I am feeling like it will be a great weekly ritual for us, creating some expectations and exciting things to look forward to for Alex in addition to making things simpler for me.

The current challenge won’t be throwing out wilted produce, but rather making sure Drew is staying out of trouble while cooking!

(blurry picture used on purpose….)

 

What You Are in Love With…

I found this amazing bumper sticker at Penzeys Spices while in Portland in June and had a bit of a squealing moment with my friend, Elena.  It became my favorite souvenir from the trip and it was FREE!  I think I was extra excited because it just sums up so much of what matters to me.  Loving people, good food and hospitality.

This week, as the summer winds down and fall creeps in (although the WEATHER here wouldn’t suggest that~~this Washington girl is ready for a little cold and rain!), I am trying to get my hands on as many simple, yummy, flavorful treats as possible.  Heirloom tomatoes, nectarines, basil…yum!

The colors, rich flavors, and simplicity makes my heart beat a little faster with glee.  My natural tendency is to want to plan, create and execute fun meals.  I love having people over, opening our home, having a leisurely meal outside with great conversation.  Not too many things that rate higher than that for me!

Enter —  stage of life of the boys…..

And yes.  Well.  Ummmm.  Hospitality.  Cooking.  Meals.  Conversations?  They just all look quite different these days from the “ideal”.

Matt graciously put child locks on all the cabinets in the kitchen this week….hallelujah!  But the corner, swivel cabinet still needs a remedy.  Alex attempted to make my cooking experiences simpler by installing his own childproofing—-masking tape.

Accepting that, though, and still looking for ways to step up and into hospitality, despite the insanity, is important to me.  I have no need to shield the world from our day-to-day lives—-the constant chatter and creations and movement.  Meals have to get a bit more basic and simplistic; timing often revolves around naps and bedtimes and baths; and conversations are often interrupted {despite working on “Excuse Me” social norms}.  But, love can still flow through those places, conversations and meals.  Hospitality can still be extended.  We can still say “yes” to God, opening ourselves up to be present and pouring out, even in the moments of red-faced embarrassment, sweaty brows from chasing a newly-mobile infant, and exhaustion.  I’m starting to see that even in these times of being at my wit’s end, times that even make extroverted me, an introvert, crave alone time, that God will give me what I need to pour out to others.  And most of the time, in those moments of communion and community, I find myself filled up ten-fold.

Prior to working at Westminster Woods, back in 2008, we were given this quote to pray with and sit with during the interview process…

Nothing is more practical than finding God, that is, than falling in love in a quite absolute, final way. What you are in love with, what seizes your imagination, will affect everything. It will decide what will get you out of bed in the morning, what you will do with your evenings, how you will spend your weekends, what you read, who you know, what breaks your heart, and what amazes you with joy and gratitude. Fall in love, stay in love and it will decide everything.

~Pedro Arrupe

It will always be a touchstone piece of writing for me.  A reminder about what really matters.  That falling in love with God first and foremost, knowing what makes me tick/what my gifts are, and then handing that back to God and serving and being/embodying that love is what it’s all about.  Do I live that way?  Not so much.  There’s a lot of growling under my breath, threatening crackers and water for dinner due to my exhaustion, and frustrations with thrown food and messy, rice-cereal covered floors.  Deep down, though, I know what makes my heart beat, and the ways I most naturally feel joy in the midst of service.  So, here’s to claiming that, our places of deepest love and joy, even in the chaos.  And frankly, the gift of mild, autumn nights, dusk skies, a glass of wine and conversation as the moon rises isn’t too shabby either.

It’s Just….Messy

I am a control, neat freak.  And I forgot just how MESSY the next few months are going to be.  Nine months until….2 years?  Or maybe until age 18?!?!

We JUST get something picked up and turn around to see everything dumped out again.

“ME!?!?  Make a mess???  Ha ha ha….Oh, Mom….”

He’ll get a little blueberry muffin for lunch….and I keep finding it, hours later.

In his hair…

In his thigh folds….

In his onsie….

In the tape of the diaper….

On the floor….

In our dog’s hair….

Almost anywhere but in his mouth!

And I keep having these “Ah-HA!” moments.  ”Oh, yes, Christine….this happened with Alex, it happens with all babies….they are just messy.”  Literally and figuratively.

Babies, along with kids in general, tend to mess a bit with the planned schedule.

Illness crops up….

Playdates are had.  Bikes are ridden.  Mud is made.  Art is created.  Food is concocted.

And all of these endeavors….even the times when they are TRYING to HELP in the clean-up….ALL of the moments often boil down to messiness.

(just take a minute to see the AMOUNT of Cheerios on Drew’s high chair…..that’s a story for another day)

And after all this internal complaining and whining, I read this post today by Ann Voskamp.  And woooo-weee, did it put things in perspective and give me a swift kick in the rear.  Take a minute to read it.  For me, this is the crux of it all…the glory in the midst of the mess.  Ann reflected,

“Perhaps, in small, unremarkable ways, I too can enter into the communion joy of dying to self?  A child wails and clings, and I’m late and the oatmeal burns.  Again to open dry lips: ‘Give thanks for his torrent of good. Lift up the cup. Drink it all down.’  Perhaps, in this high calling to humble living, it is possible to remember daily his far greater sacrifice, his innumerable unmerited kindnesses, and choose to give thanks for whatever he gives in the moment—all of it.”

And to choose to give thanks…..for WHATEVER HE GIVES….ALL of it.  Even the Cheerios.  Even the dumped out toys.  Even the muffins, muffins everywhere.

Do I remember to give thanks in these messy moments??  Ah, no.  Especially after having two sleepless nights in a row.  Not. A. Pretty. Picture.  So yes, I’m messy too.  We all are….even in our best moments, when things are all organized and put away and our lives are neat and tidy.  And that is why we need Grace.  Because even when it looks perfect, even when we are fooled into thinking life is ideal, we are reminded that these moments are short-lived.  And our happiness is temporal.  Joy and gratitude must ring true because of Something that is deeper, longer and wider than any circumstance.  The LOVE that grants us Grace—even when we mess up in the messy moments.

Slowing

Last week while we were on my birthday getaway, Matt’s mom was here with the boys.  She commented on our return that her time with them had surprisingly relieved some great pain and tension that had been plaguing her back.  I laughed to myself thinking, “How could spending 24 hours with these two busy boys RELIEVE back pain?!?”  And then we realized that one of the less celebrated and appreciated joys in life is sitting with a baby, giving them their bottle.  Forced slowing.  Forced break.  Forced to sit down and savor and breathe.

And today, I was finally cognizant of this same truth.  Drew’s been fighting a bug and it was “gifted” to me today in full force.  Aches.  Pains.  Exhaustion.  Sore throat.  Runny & stuffy nose.  NO. FUN.  Drew can attest.

So tonight, I relished in the nighttime routine.  I sat and was present.  I slowed down.  Evidently Alex needed the same thing because after I got Drew down to bed, I went to check on him in the tub and he was slumped over with his head resting on his knees.  He assured me, as I feared he’d drowned, that he was just extra sleepy.

So, we’re slowing.  Trying to be still.  Rest.  And reflect.  Because four years ago tonight…..

(nope, Buddy….FOUR….not ten, although some days it FEELS like ten….)

…four years ago, we were heading to bed, having no clue that mere hours later a little munchkin would arrive on the scene….EARLY!  More details on that tomorrow.

As a sidenote….Matt did not rest today.  He went gung-ho crazy and finished the playstructure–with some real help (his dad, Kerry) and some attempted help.

And….confession….I went on a superhero / cupcake frenzy.

Can’t wait to celebrate tomorrow, after a LONG sleep and taking my own feeble advice to slow down.

“Be STILL and know that I am God….Be STILL and know that I am God….”

~psalm 46:10

{repeat after me…}

“Jesus Fell Out in the OVEN!”

We made the resurrection rolls this morning….

Alex wasn’t in the mood.  My back has completely gone out to the point of having trouble breathing and picking up Drew.

And then the rolls came out of the oven.

“BUT I WANT JESUS BACK!”

“JESUS FELL OUT IN THE OVEN!!!”

“JESUS MELTED AWAY! FIND HIM, MOMMY!”

Kind of added a lighter mood to the morning’s proceedings.  That and my Blue Bottle Co. coffee, soy chorizo sausage, avocado, grilled polenta and poached egg!  YUM.  Hoping to get a picture of the boys in their Easter finest later this morning.  We’ll see what *mood* prevails!

Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ!

In his great mercy he has given us new birth into a living hope

through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead,

and into an inheritance that can never perish, spoil or fade. 

~I Peter 1:3-4

Ahh….dates.

You may think I’m speaking of the kind of “dates” that are hard to come by with two young children, aka “date nights”.  But, no.  I’m talking about the glorious Medjool dates.

I was first turned on to these beauties while watching Brothers & Sisters.  And then there was a great article in Real Simple on smoothies.

And soon my addiction was born.  I substitute unflavored soy milk or 1% milk for the whole milk that the recipe calls for.  This is a deceptively healthy treat…yum!

Creamy Date Smoothie

Ingredients

• 3/4 cup 1% or soy milk
• 1/3 cup halved pitted dates
• 1/2 cup cup ice

Directions

1. Place the milk and dates in a blender.
2. Cover and refrigerate until the dates have softened, about 15 minutes.
3. Add the ice and blend until smooth and frothy.